Tuesday, May 23, 2006
That Little Boy of Mine...
"A tiny turned-up nose, Two cheeks just like a rose
So sweet from head to toes....that little boy of mine.
Two eyes that shine so bright, Two arms to hold me tight,
Two lips to kiss goodnight....that little boy of mine.
No one will ever know, Just what his coming has meant,
Because we love him so, He must be Heaven-sent...
He climbs up on my knee, He's all the world to me,
To me he'll always be....that little boy of mine..."
He has to lean down to hug me now. A few months ago I could easily slide my arm around his shoulders, accustomed to his childhood voice of the last 13 years. Now the words he says are deeper and from the throes of adolescence. And I wonder where those years have gone.
I wasn't prepared for the absolute delight of having a little boy. My first child, a daughter, was cautious with herself in the world. Though loving and beautiful, she was particular to whom she gave her affections to and carried herself delicately amongst things unknown. Her little brother bore an amazing resemblance to her with his dark eyes and sweet face, but he quickly developed his own personality, endearing him to me and marking his own place in my heart.
I remember holding him close when he was very tiny and him taking my hand and laying it gently upon his cheek. He was so affectionate with a perpetual smile and energy that temporarily came to rest alongside him in bed each night. A sensitive child, he learned early to guard the feelings of others and appreciate what was true and beautiful in life.
He was my helper in the kitchen, my champion brownie-taster. My partner in creepy-crawler-making, he kept me young and enthusiastic with his genuine wonder and excitement over little things.
Always our clown, he soon found that a silly face could bring a reaction, but has - for the most part - used it to entertain only a receptive audience...at appropriate moments!
Like his father and sister, he loves cats and has grown up with at least one curled beside him. And though his volume is turned WAY up more often than not, he seems to know when noise is nuisance rather than necessity... and learned that quiet creatures prefer peace over racket.
Though in many ways he is a "typical boy", he possesses a certain tenderness and a gentle spirit that serves as a guide in how he treats others. His capacity for reading right from wrong is great and his kind and forgiving heart is so very precious.
His babyhood days are vivid: Batman costumes and decorating sugar cookies, "treasure" walks around the neighborhood and refreshing sprinkler runs in the backyard. Swinging on the board swing at Nan and Pop's house, moving to his "big boy bed", that first haircut.....and little black cowboy boots. I feel a little hand in mine and soft kisses upon my cheek at bedtime. I hear sweet songs on cassette tapes and contagious giggling with his big sister. It's hard to see him growing up.
But he is. I cannot stop that...and I wouldn't want to. Just as there were memorable moments from his baby days and childhood, I know that ahead lies many adventures and exciting experiences. I really wouldn't want him to stay little, for I'm enjoying getting to know who he's becoming. The young man who sits beside me today is one I'm very proud of, knowing he is making good decisions and choosing a path that is leading him in the right direction. He is on his way to the wonderful man that I know he will be. I will have to let go, let him fly...and it will be all right. And when he is grown and gone from the nest and the safety of my arms he will still and always be....
That little boy of mine.