Tuesday, January 17, 2006

Choosing to love

Once upon a time, I dreamed of marrying a handsome prince who would whisk me away to a mythical castle and make all my dreams come true.

And then I grew up.

For most of us, that prince (or princess) doesn't exist. At least not in the way that we once imagined. Instead of Camelot we come face to face with a world that is not always so enchanting; a blemished Utopia. Marriage is not for the weak-willed, the noncommitted, the intolerant, disloyal or selfish. It is a work in progress, always changing, always challenging, always asking for intervention and action. It tests your heart, it shakes your roots, it blows against your sails, sometimes taking you into uncharted and unfamiliar waters. It asks for patience, consideration, faithfulness and dedication. And once given, they are sometimes stretched to the limit in a journey that tests them all.

Inside a photo booth this man (now my husband) and I sat, waiting for a flash to capture the mood. We should have displayed somberness, stress, worry and fear. I was awaiting medical tests and an uncertain future. But instead we seized the moment, grabbing joy and fun and living life as it is intended. And though sometimes it indeed, kicks you in the pants, you can counter the bruises with laughter, light-heartedness and the will to forge ahead, turbulence and all.

Perhaps our castle will never be built, and maybe our dreams haven't come true. But the prince who sticks by me through both the black and white and technicolor moments of life makes the wishing more fun and the magic, more real.

15 comments:

Nelly said...

What a beautiful post. I was almost in tears! Have a great day!

Mellissa said...

;-) At least you know he will never have cold feet Lori ((snicker)).

Nice post - and what a handsome prince you have there!!!

Mellissa

Pete Mitchell said...

Ewwww. Kissing. Blech.

Seriously though, your writing just keeps getting better and better. Loved the opening and the sudden twist with "And then I grew up.", and the imagery throughout the post is fantastic.

And on a semi-related note about countering the bruises: When my mother passed away, the woman who conducted her service, the Reverand Kristine Swire, and I got on like a house on fire (much to the amazement of many). Though I was grieving deeply, we had a hoot and shared a lot of (sometimes dark) jokes and many, many laughs. At the get together after the service, we were sharing some more jokes, and a couple of friends of the family, got on their high horses and started to chastise me for being disrespectful for laughing. I countered with the fact that my mother herself would have encouraged it and wouldn't have wanted to be remembered in a solemn service. But the Reverand Swire leapt into the fray with a couple of lines that your comment reminded me of:

"There is more strength in laughter than there is in tears."

and "Anyone can share the gift of tears, but to share the gift of a laugh or a smile is truly doing the Lord's work."

I'll now be adding "counter the bruises with laughter" to those wise words.

(And sorry for the long comment. Wasn't meant to be about me; but to emphasize what you said. Honest.)

clew said...

Lori, this really speaks to me. Enough said :)

srp said...

It is obvious that you have truly found your "prince" and he his "princess". You are both blessed.

naive-no-more said...

You definitely have your fairy tale, even if it's not the exact same we dream about as little girls. I'm so very happy for you!

Neil said...

You are one good-looking couple!

Michael said...

I remember our talks about this subject. Remember way back when? I think we both have learned lessons.

Networkchic said...

Wow. I believe you are right, marriage is not for the weak willed. I wish we all knew that before we so blindly trudged ahead. But now I'm older and I know that and next time I'm married, it will be forever. I think you have that castle and the prince to go in it. Sometimes we get so caught up in what fairy tales are supposed to look/feel like, that we miss the chance to live happily ever after.

McSwain said...

Even if life isn't always the fairy tale you've imagined, it's clear you have a prince. And as others have noticed, a handsome one as well! This is so beautifully written. I love coming here. Sigh...

Rebecca said...

This was beautiful. Simply beautiful. And honest. And pure. And real.

Thank you!

abcd said...

Hi Lori,
This is a great post and one
that holds great meaning for me.
I of course did read about a medical test and I hope you are OK.
I have a favor-I have posted on my site another blogger whose name is Deb. I have her web address listed, she is getting ready for a stem cell transplant. She has a great blog, and can use some support. If you have time please stop by and offer her support.

Lance said...

Nice

martie said...

Lovely ~ and you are so right about marriage not being for the weak. Marriage, like life in general, is a work in progress that requires a lot of hard work to make it work, and it is not a destination in and of itself.....it is a journey and luckily for some(including me) a fabulous journey at that!

Heidi said...

What a beautiful couple..I was smiling at this entry. :)